Shock Therapy - They don't just do it in the movies

One thing I've always wanted to try besides Botox, Taming a wild hawk guitar lessons is shock therapy.  Well, today I got my chance!  What a weird (and not so comfortable) experience.  Basically, they hook you up to these nodes kinda like they do to crazy people in movies.  Except I didn't get to attack my annoying neighbor with a hot-glue gun or hide in a porta-potty toliet to deserve it.  The nodes send a shock to motor points that force your body into positions.  In my case, the shocks force my hand to close into a fist (well as close to a fist as I can get anyway).  It's interesting to say the least.

I saw the surgeon yesterday.  I didn't exactly get good news, but it's not bad news yet.  The skin flap he used to cover my stud is not gonna make it (that's OK flap-dude, just grow some more skin under your dying, patheticness and we'll be cool).  I have an option to go ahead with the skin graft surgery.  If I do, my healing time will be shortened but I would lose more finger.  And it's another surgery.  My other option is to keep waiting and pray that there is indeed good healthy skin growing under dying flap-dude. (Mr. Surgeon recommends this option).  My patience is growing very thin with the healing process.  I can't believe I'm saying this, but I actually miss running.  I sleep on the wrong side of the bed to keep my hand on the outside and miss MY side.  I miss wrestling and picking up my kiddos.  It's hot and I want to swim.  I miss knitting (oh wait, I don't knit).  I'm still not able to hang my hand by my side and it basically hurts most of the time.  And did I mention it hurts?  Ok, ok, pity party over.

Overall, I'm doing well.  Rustin is fabulous, my kids are wild but sweet and my friends call and visit often. I have a new splint that leaves me with almost zero functionality but makes the injury less obvious which means I can stop telling nosy concerned strangers that an Obamacare supporter bit my finger off after I punched him. 

No, MY bundt cake!

People bring me food everyday. They also bring me dessert. I love it and these meals are truly a blessing. However, I can't run yet and I've encouraged the kids to have lots of dessert every night. Because believe me, I will finish whatever is left the next day. And although I love muffins, not looking for a top.

So today, my sweet friend Chesley brought a little of this heaven over.







The kids were begging for seconds but nope, these little heaven cakes are all mine. I think Adalae wanted to punch something (probably me).







Bring on the muffin top!

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Good news, finally

Thade's curve in his spine is not serious. And now I have some major ammunition to make him sit up straight. Any time I see him slouching, I just contort myself into the most unnatural position possible and walk in front of him. He sits up straight then, very straight.

Thank you for the prayers!

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Hello BlueCross, it's me Heather

So BlueCross BlueShield (or should I say Overhead Door Corp) really thought they hit it big with a member that passes every well check up with flying colors and has a anomaly child who's never even had an ear infection.  Well, the medical expenses the Gradke family has incurred this month will make every premium payment I ever made worth it.  Probably every house and car insurance premium payment too.  Today Thade had his well check and we found out he has Scoliosis.  We don't know yet the degree but he had an X-ray late this afternoon.  We should know more tomorrow.  I'm guessing his practice of hunching over the XBox for 12 hours a day will not be recommended therapy.  So, I'm asking for more prayers.  Please pray the scoliosis is not serious and that Thade can continue a normal, active life - with better posture.

I've started therapy and in addition to my home exercises, see the occupational therapist 2x per week.  I asked for a parking pass my last visit and the valet guy was all, "what do I look like?  a college campus security guard".  And I'm like, "what I look like?  money bags?".  And then my BMW pulled up and all I had was my sad looking hand to wave around for pity.  I still didn't get a parking pass.

Tomorrow I see my surgeon again and get the stitches removed.  Not really looking forward to it.  I wonder if they can put me under for that?  My finger doesn't look better, but I'm hoping it's just because I see it everyday.  I'm praying the surgeon sees something else that means no skin grafts, no more surgery.

On to less depressing stuff - kid pictures!

Adalae helps Barbara water the plants.

 Reed loves "butter cake". He also wore this hat for 72 hours straight.  Frisco Rough Riders game.

Thade made this boat with his granddad.  He could only use duct tape and cardboard.  Crazy, huh?  He placed 3rd in the race and won best style.

 Reed got to join the boys annual camping trip this year.  It was so cold, the trip lasted an entire 12 hours.

It's only a finger.

It hardly seems right my first post in over a year is about this.  Believe me, my life has been full of awesomeness this past year.  The past week just happens to have sucked, big time.  Losing a body part has created such a strange mix of emotions.  One minute I'm hit with the realization that my physical appearance is forever changed.  But then I remember it's not forever and in heaven, I'll be perfect and look just like Jesus.  It's weird - although this freaky thing happened to me and at times I feel like I'll never be the same, at the same time I've never felt more blessed.  And I definitely know now that everyone here on earth loves me just the same, freaky hand or not.  Rustin has truly been perfect during this storm.  My kids are amazing and Thade has actually started hanging out with mom again (on his own will!).  My sweet, sweet mother in law, PJ, hopped the first plane to Dallas the night it happened to help us that week.  My Mom calls me every day.  My sister in law, Barbara, sleeps in cold, stinky, hospital room chairs with nothing more than a beach towel and takes me to Dr. appointments.  Our friends bring us food and prayers and sweet words of comfort every single day.  My work family has been so supportive and flexible with my needs. I could go on and on.

My sweet friend Kelli sent me this verse last week and I read it everyday. 

There's more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we're hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we're never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can't round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit! Romans 5:3-5
I know God wouldn't give me more than I can handle.  And I may not understand today what I should be alert for, but believe me, I'm alert.  I do believe this seemingly tragic experience is preparing me for something bigger than a finger.


Now for the medical update and prayer requests.  And please pray because I promise God is listening.  So my stud... (I think I vomit a little in my mouth anytime I hear the word stump now so I will call it a stud.  sounds much more attractive, don't you think?).  The skin flap the surgeon used to cover the top of my stud is dead.  We plan to watch it a few more days in hopes there is new skin forming underneath and the dead skin will eventually scab and come off.  Otherwise, I'll need another surgery for a skin graft.  So please pray for healing.  I just don't know if I can take another surgery right now.

I have my 1st physical therapy appointment tomorrow.  I saw the therapist at my surgeon's office Tues and she gave me hand exercises to work on.  Lemme tell you, it is painful getting this hand working again.  I could really use some prayers for strength and the willpower to keep up with this therapy. 

Lastly, say a little prayer for Rustin.  Or while you're at it, send him a note telling him to keep up the good work because he deserves some serious love.  Emotionally, I am getting better every day.  And I owe much of that progress to my sweet husband who remembers to tell me how much he loves me, and often.  After all, it is just a finger.